Five Little Ducks

This is why I teach.

Alex

I'd like to work out a few issues I have rolling in my head concerning Alex. I'm actually quite concerned about him. He's smart, very smart, but...he doesn't seem to be dealing well with things at home. I know his father is in Seoul and worried he doesn't spend enough time with his son. He's an only child and badly wants a little brother. He lies and says he does, or once he told Bianca that his plastic dinosaur was his brother. He also told her once that he wanted to stay little, which Bianca thought was odd coming from a child. Peter Pan complex, I guess. But I think it has more to do with wanting to be little and have his mother, or a mother figure, take care of him. I wish I sympathized with him on a day to day basis, but I just get so...annoyed...at him all the time. I can't help it.

New Kid

Showed up to work today and found a new girl in my kindergarten Earth class (advanced, 7 years). Her English is quite fluid, better, I think, than the other kids. The only problem is she can't read...and the reading materials are not easy in that class. I have a feeling she's going to need extra help.

Two days later...

Well. Earth class is utterly miserable to be around. Alex (a quite brilliant child, but a pain in the ass) has turned into a little baby, wrapping himself around me, wanting me to hold his hand all the time, sobbing. The girls fight with Henna (yes, her name actually is Henna) over whiteboard erasers. Bianca, my coworker, is fed up with them as well. I don't know what I'm expected to do with her really. Make math class "fun," meanwhile I'm still supposed to be teaching the other kids so their parents don't complain, and Henna can't write her numbers. I'm going to end up disappointing SOME parent. And of course that's my fault.

Ugh.

World Cup Again

We needed a win tonight. Two draws. After the initial "win" against England, we were all pumped up for an actual win. A real win. Vince and I both desperately wanted us to go through to the next round.

But the game! Ugh! Slow, painful....by the end we all just looked, to quote a favorite actress of mine, like "scared rabbits." The whole bar. So did the fans on the screen. Even Bill Clinton, who they showed several times. Just dead serious. As if every American, at home and abroad, was holding their breath. We don't care about soccer. But we do like to win.

And in the LAST four minutes! The last four! Overtime. We scored a goal, and I swear to God, the entire bar jumped straight into the air, laughing, cheering, out of relief and joy and I jumped up and hugged several people swinging my legs in the air. It was fantastic.

Am SO glad I stayed for that.

World Cup

Along with my fellow Americans, I possess slight interest (read none) in soccer (football?). And yet, somehow, the urge to get one over the British in a sport more favored in their land then ours, unites me with my other Americans who have a half-assed interest in the sport sparked by the fact we have a game against England. Well, Vince. My soccer partner in crime. :) Hehehehehehehehehe.

So, despite the fact that we couldn't...quite...recall the name of the star guy on our team...Findley?...or name a single other player on our team, we both cheered our way through the first Korea game (we won!) and valiantly threw darts till 3:30 rolled around, proceeded to make our way to a chicken place, where we ordered a plate of fried chicken and a pitcher of beer and tensely sat as the game took off (so to speak, rather a slow sport as a matter of fact.)

And we did it! Well, it was a draw. But you know what, that's as good as a victory. We took it like that. Vince and I. So did the national media back home. Some asshole "ajoshi" sat in the back jeering America, despite what South Korea owes to the US.

It was near 7 in the morning, but we weren't quite ready to go home, so we got a couple of beers at the Family Mart and walked to Vince's apartment where his girlfriend was sleeping (early work morning) to get some more beers. I tried to say hi, she's a friend of mine, too, but I think she was too conked to notice.

We walked down to the beach and chatted for about an hour, until Bill called. We stayed out another half hour, and I came back just as Bill was in the shower getting ready for work.

And then I passed out.

Birthday Party

Today was a birthday party. For the kindergarten. I hosted. Bianca dreaded it, so I volunteered (as I was to learn later, Bianca, my fellow teacher, despises public speaking). It was pretty easy, just joke around with the kids, "Are all those presents for ME????" and introduce each one, and ask them a couple of questions, and help the kids present the birthday kids with their presents. Takes forever, though.

Somehow, though, it was a letdown. They got the kids all excited...and then no games. What kind of birthday party doesn't have games? Of course, they let 'em run around like mad animals afterward, in the English Village, which is this big room with different building facades, hospital, police station, fast food joint, beauty parlor, grocery store. Which meant I got to deal with ten hyperactive, overindulged seven-year olds. Fun.

My latest addiction

I have recently, within the last five months, picked up playing darts as my new poison. Not as addictive as MMOs, but nonetheless, fairly addictive, though this may be mostly due to my personality. I seem to have something of a natural talent for it; while my rating is much lower than my boyfriend's (who is slightly below a lot of our mutual friends), I make 'em work for their wins, and pick up a few myself along the way. I kick patootie in closing out '01. And I have a particular fondness for triple 19s (and, oddly enough in one game, triple 10s). I am pretty decent in aiming and hitting 16s, 17, 19s, and 15s (15s being one of the weaker). I can't hit 18s and 20s at all, but I make up for that in triple 19s and 17s. In a game with several people, I'm easily ignorned and manage to scrape third or second..and I'm really not a bad player overall. I have times where I'm beating everyone else; though that rarely lasts through an entire game. And I'm a definite asset when we partner up.

Last night I got my first Three in a Bed (in 3s, but who cares?). And a seven mark round in Cricket (the highest of the game, I remember for sure, probably the highest of the night, unless I missed something). My rating went up from 2.5 to 2.6. My PPD lowered slightly, but my MPR went up from 1.26 to 1.31. Plus, Bill bought Vince's old case, since it was just what I was looking for. It was so sweet of him to think of me like that. I'd been wanting a case for a long time, but the only one they sold at the bar was too big. This one had been passed through a couple of owners, which I like, since it gave it some history. And it was JUST the right size.

Think I might try to play a few more nights during the week...

A First Impression of My New Job

Well.

I can't say it's everything I built up in my head, but upon careful reflection I have noted the following; that I have a 1) better job overall 2) better apartment and 3) better social network than the previous year. My landlord is friendly and speaks English. He fixed my light bulbs and toilet the first day I moved in, since they weren't working and when I bought new pastel green blinds he installed them within three days of my asking him for help.

As for the job itself, while I do have rather significant downtime between classes, at least this time I have two other native teachers to hang out with, sometimes three if my friend Dennis is around (he's the one who recommended me to apply at this school to begin with). I teach....a lot of classes. Not to sound vague, but without a schedule in front of me, I lose track. I teach thirty-one classes, to six different kindergarten groups and four elementary age groups. I think. I teach science, math, classics, drama, conversation, and boardgames. And maybe something else. It's a little complicated.

The kids, however, are adorable and well-behaved for the most part. I find the minutes much more rewarding then before, though the actual hours are just okay. 9:50AM to 5:30PM. Okay, so that's probably really good hours for a job back in the States. Probably mostly unheard of. And my rent is a twelfth of my paycheck.

I only have two real problem kids. The one I really just dislike. The other... I am actually getting quite fond of him and suspect he may turn into my favorite kid. He's just so curious and energetic with a strong predisposition towards learning. He just is too needy and wants too much of my attention in a class of ten. He wants me to focus solely on him, but I have nine other students to pay attention to.

Anyway, it is vitally important that I now eat Cajun chicken with pasta and a yogurt-based dressing with avocados, green peppers, onion, and carrot and watch episodes of South Park on a 48 inch wide screen full HD TV.

My Life In Korea Begins Again

One Year Ago...

I Arrive in Korea
Am sitting at my new desk, in my new office. This morning was a whirl of excitement. Got my health check (drug test, blood test, chest x-ray), opened up a bank account, met my principal, was shown to my classroom and given textbooks to study, ate lunch (beef and vegetable soup, kim chee, rice, tempura eggplant, pickled vegetables), and met a Canadian named John who promised to introduce me to some Koreans and Canadians. I guess he’s lived here for two years now. We’re supposed to meet up in front of the E-Mart at seven, because I have absolutely no contact information yet. I haven’t even seen my apartment.

On the whole, I am grateful to have even MADE it to my home town. I nearly missed my transfer flight to Busan when I discovered, an hour before departure, that my light left from a DIFFERENT airport than the one I currently had my feet planted on. Yay! Just what I wanted, not an hour in a strange country, and already I had to figure out the transportation system. Fortunately there was a bus that left for the other airport at just the moment I needed, and I managed to convert a few thousand of their currency with the little cash I had on hand. Thirty minutes before departure, I arrived at the airport, whisked through security—only to be held up by the presence of one aerosol can that security determined to be hairspray (it was actually my mace that my mother had bought for me years ago, never used once, but got in the habit of carrying around anyway, didn’t think would be a problem shipped under). At precisely 8:16, my flight leaving at 8:30, I sprinted to my gate, arriving at 8:19. Eleven minutes to spare. Awesome.

The rest of the day proceeded smoothly. I met my teacher, got a brief tour of the elementary school, got into my apartment, unpacked, ate…hmmm, lunch consisted of soup, rice, kim chee, pickled cucumber, and….some sort of beef dish, I guess. Korean food appears to be mainly rice, kim chee and other pickled veggies, a soup (often seafood), and a beef/veggie dish.

Oh! And I met my first non Korean friend, a Canadian who’d been living in Korea for two years, teaching of course.

Update:
Apartment is lovely. Big room with desk, chair, couch, and bed. Two big closets and a third smaller. Sliding door opens to kitchen area, small table, and washer/dryer. And a bathroom, although with no proper shower. Koreans just use a showerhead. More space than I have at home, although the kitchen isn’t as nice as ours.

Sleep now, although jet lag has yet to catch up with me.

The Canadian is long gone. Moved back to Canada, I believe, though I may be mistaking him for a different Canadian. My view of my job and apartment has altered decidedly. I no longer like either.

But this year is another fresh start.

So let me begin.

I begin this year, I think to myself on my walk to my new school (though I did go one stop on the subway to save time and ensure I didn't get lost and show up late my first day) on April Fool's Day once again. A joke. "Where are you going to work?" "Korea." "Really. Well, when are you leaving?" "April 1st." "Okay, where are you really working?" "No, I'm serious. I'm going to teach English in South Korea."

I find the idea of starting afresh on a joke appeals to me. Unconventional, perhaps. An annoyance, for sure. After all, I start my job one month into the public school year, which essentially means I'm forced to take a hagwon job (a hagwon is a private school). But that is what I want for myself this year. It'll mean starting my life over, again, my intended whirlwind escapade through Asia and Europe, on April Fool's Day. I like that. I used to think of life in terms of semesters, fall semester, winter break, spring semester, summer break. I got to college and the fall and spring semesters got shorter and the winter and summer vacations got longer, but on the whole my schedule remained the same. For the moment, I think of my life in terms of one year contracts. Every year, to some extent, I start my life afresh.

To summarize: I have a new job, a (fairly recently acquired) boyfriend, a new apartment. The job is as follows: I teach at a kindergarten from 9:50AM to 12:00PM. I teach three classes a day, varying in age from 5 to 7 (though I'm fairly certain that's Korean age). I teach Science, Math, Social Studies, Conversation, and Boardgames. Conversation is fairly free form, and I've got some ideas of what I want to do, but I'm still in the process of figuring it out. Working at a hagwon is very much thrown to the wolves. Here's a class, here's some books, here are the kids. See you in three hours. Maybe. We'll be around, but please don't annoy us too much with questions. I haven't started the afternoon portion of my work yet. That begins Monday. But it's from 2-7PM on Wednesday and Friday and from 4-7PM on Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. To elementary age students. Fifty minute classes with ten minutes in between. I plan on being much more assertive as a teacher, particularly in those afternoon classes. The Boyfriend is disappointed I'm not moving in with him. But he's very loving and cooks good food for me and is very supportive of my plans. And he's very excited to see me on weekends. Which brings me to my new apartment: It is..I don't know...I guess it's a bit small, but it suits me just fine. And it has everything I need. Except a microwave. I'm picking that up tomorrow.

I walked home after work to figure out the best way. It's only about a thirty minute walk, which is perfect. Just enough to get some good exercise out of it.

Tonight I was supposed to meet Jae for dinner, but she forgot, so I went next door to a restaurant someone had told me was famous. The guy was asleep at the counter..I didn't want to wake him, but I heard some noise near the back, so I went over and his wife and son were in the back room, they lived there I think, and she woke him up and I pointed to a picture on the menu of sushi and she sat me down in a little room. She brought course after course...quite a lot of food in the end, though I could only eat half of it. Some of the fish was just a little too exotic for me. But I did eat things that I couldn't identify. And I ate enough to get full. I thought it was good to treat myself to a nice dinner my first night, well, second, but it was my first day at work. And I get paid on the fifth.

Oops!

Hmm, it turns out this guy Tim is moving and he wants me to take his place at triv. I was supposed to go next week; it's flattering to think they think I'm prepared ahead of time. And I'm excited, so I said yes. But this means I better review my questions. Triv is on Sunday. Adieu!

poetry

I asked a little girl what her name was today.

She said, "Barbie."

I thought, Well, that's not the worst I've heard.

Hiroshima

I left off at Friday...we spent Saturday, Sunday in Hiroshima, then took the bullet train back to Osaka early the next morning after a substantial breakfast where we visited the aquarium and the world's largest Ferris wheel (or so it advertised).

But more on Hiroshima (pronounced "Hi-RO-shi-ma"). Nagasaki may be anti-American finger pointing (and perhaps justifiably so, am not going to touch that), but Hiroshima is anything but. It is not an embittered desolation; it is, in fact, a beacon of world peace.

Bill and I took a leisurely walk around the Peace Park, at least I believe that is what it is called.

But the museum was what really hit me.

There was bits of paper with characters burnt out iron doors blown out, wax figures skin dripping off bodies. And yet, I was most impressed by the vision of peace, no hint of guilt or finger pointing, even an upfront admission of the fact that Korean and Chinese slaves were also killed in the blast, followed by a lengthy presentation of Hiroshima's development as a significant military city before beginning to talk about the bomb. The only times the words "American" or "United States," came up was a single bilboard presentation with the question, why did the US bomb Japan, answered very matter of factly.. because of feeling threat from Germany and so forth, and also included what was described as a "suprise attack" on Pearl Harbor by the Japanese. Very simple, clean. This is why war is horrific. And now a sincere wish for peace. The thought crossed my mind, what changes a city from a war stronghold to a city of peace, an atomic bomb.

It's amazing. I wrote in the journal put there for visitors to the museum

This may sound strange but there are few times that I am genuinely moved by humanity and this was one of them. As an American I did not feel ashamed but rather informed of the horrors of nuclear war and moved to strive for world peace as a worthy endeavor not hopeless. I admire Hiroshima and wish the best in their vision

I want to write the NYT about this. How i felt, why Hiroshima is worth visiting.

At night we took pictures with the full moon in the background behind the A Dome and pictures of our shoes on the T-bridge where the bomb was supposed to hit.

Japan...A Real Update

Alright, now that that silliness is aside, I shall provide a real update.

Well, first, off, despite God`s best intentions, I have arrived in Japan at long last. I`m not kidding. First, there are NO ships leaving the week I have vacation. I manage to delay my vacation till now, and there is ONE ship leaving that I can get to Japan in time to make it back to Korea without missing more than a day of classes. The day before my boat leaves, I come down with fever. The morning I leave, my neck muscles spasm, leaving me in extreme pain (thank God, oooh, guess I owe him something for that, for having a wonderful boyfriend along to carry my bags when it gets too painful and constant little massages).

Then the boat breaks. No. Really. Bill and I meet up with a bunch of foreigners and we drink in the bar and make jokes and watch some magician perform street tricks. We all figure we aren`t going anywhere and may as well make the best of what we have. I go to the sauna six times to relax my neck and back muscles. We do leave...nine hours later, after waiting a good hour and a half just to get on board. The company says they`ll recompensate us 7,000 JPY (something under 70 USD) and Bill gets us a room with a shower (love the lovely hot water).

But the point, is we did get to Japan.

We get in, find our hostel, get settled, find something to eat. We find what turns into what Bill refers to as "our favorite noodle place." Its a casual udon sitdown. You put money into a vending machine and press a button under the menu item you want. It spits out a ticket, you turn around to the counter and there`s your meal being set out on a tray. And the bathrooms! I got back to our table after washing up, and the first words, practically, I announce in Japan are "The bathrooms. I could live here." For one they`re clean. And there`s a little sprayer on the side with directions to wipe off the toilet when you:re done (which I rather felt obliged to do) and the automatic hand dryer actually DRIED my hands.

Did I mention Japan is quiet, too? Bill still cannot get over that. Korea is just so loud and noisy, in the way that Japan just....isn`t.

The next morning, we checked out a flea market being held at a shrine. The plum blossoms are JUST coming out now, and its absolutely gorgeous. I found a very cute little wooden Japanese doll, and after much soul searching, found the perfect white and blue ceramic with overlaid silver dragon artwork perfume bottle, both for quite good prices. I fell in love with a stunning white kimino which, if I were getting married, I would have bought in an instant, but I just couldn`t justify the cost at present. And took dozens of pictures of the flowers. I practiced my Japanese and become quite confident at pointing at an object and declaring "Kore wa ikura desuka..." (How much is this?)

I actually quite like speaking Japanese, the little I know. And I LOVE the Japanese word for yes, or "hai." It`s not "Hi, hey what`s up?" It`s a very strong, deep "HAI." Not necessarily loud, but firm.

That same day, we also visited the Golden Pavilion and chatted with a group of Indonesian, Malaysian girls living in Australia, visiting Japan for a fortnight. The pavilion was absolutely beautiful. We were both impressed, and spoke of returning when there was snow to see the snow covering the shrine and surrounding pond.

We also walked through another shrine at night. I love the contrast of walking out of a very old, asture Buddhist temple into a street full of cars and buses and mart shops.

The next day we checked out the monkey park and the manga museum before catching the Shinkansen to Hiroshima. Shall update more on that later, though I am rather tired now. We were lucky to find a hotel quite close. We didn:t even have to walk. We took the electric cable car and our hotel was right at the corner. I took a long soak in the bath, since the "onsan," or public bathhouse in the hotel, was closed to women when we arrived. I guess there:s only one and it alternates usage between men and women.

Oh, and the woman at the hotel lobby taught me to say "I am in Japan," hence my earlier post.

Good night from Japan! Going to walk down the shopping street tomorrow to the War Museum and Memorial Park.

JAPAN!!! (How about another exclamation mark?...I dont know if thats necessary...No, its probably not necessary)

I am in Japan! (Watashi wa Nihon ni imasu!)

My iTunes receipt, or "A glimpse into who I am"

Item Number Description Unit Price

1 That's How You Know
$1.29
2 True Love's Kiss
$1.29
3 (Do You Wanna Date My) Avatar (feat. Felicia Day)
$0.99
4 If You're Into It
$0.99
5 As Time Goes By
$0.99

Subtotal: $5.55
Tax: $0.00

Order Total: $5.55

a foreigner's perspective on a film about outsiders

Spoiler alert! If you haven't watched Avatar, you may want to put off reading this.

Apologize for the delay in writing. Have actually got something both timely and interesting to write about...namely, James Cameron's Avatar.

Now, where shall I start? With the special effects? May as well, it's a point, but the least of what really got to me, so may as well get that out of the way. They were pretty, and took years, I guess, in the making. Someone said it was a combination of Fern Gully and...oh, I forget now...but I was reminded of Fern Gully. A few scenes were reminiscent of the imagery from 300. I liked that. I'm a sucker for artistic detail, even if I don't like the plot. Though in this case, I was quite carried along by the story.

Which brings me to the content. Yes, it was a little preachy. The evil Skygivers come destroy the spiritual native people who live in trees. For profit. I didn't mind that.

But the part I found most interesting was how I identified with the lead actor, Jake Sully...particularly when he became the alien. And not because of an emotional connection, but because of, how can I put this, a curious physical coincidence...

I have lately become somewhat obsessed with the relationship between our physical selves and our mental selves. That who we are, how we think, is determined by our outward appearance, our physicality....1984 said that if we can't say a word, we can't think it. That is to say, if we have no word for freedom or love, and cannot physically express it, we can't even know it.

Only by taking over a physical body resembling the "aliens," though in the final scene Jake refers to humans as "aliens," can he be a part of the native society. His physical appearance makes this possible. He looks like them. It made me think about us expats living in Korea. We can learn Korean, learn the culture, but we still won't look like Koreans.

But the thing I was referring to before...the curious physical coincidence...was something else. The movie was in English with Korean subtitles. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, when the dialogue switched to the the alien tongue, the subtitles continued only in Korean. This annoyed me, initially, or at least I thought it would annoy me. But I found it helped me relate better to Jake. I was denied what most of the audience was given, and found myself, with Jake, struggling to understand the situation. I had to rely on the body language, tonal clues given by the aliens. I could translate small bits...translating the word for "here" and thus was able to extrapolate what I felt must be something along the lines of "Why did you bring him [Jake] here?" If that wasn't the exact line, I felt it was a close enough approximation. But then I stopped trying. It didn't matter. It wasn't necessary. I knew any dialogue which Jake couldn't understand, would be explained later. It even added a bit to the suspense. It's one thing, when the aliens are discussing whether or not they are going to kill Jake-- and there's a subtitle, designed to provide the audience with maximum understanding. It's another when its translated by one of the aliens themselves. I couldn't help but be a little suspicious...like, what are they NOT saying...? There are subtleties that may be lost in translation. I knew, because Jake didn't speak the alien tongue, that nothing they said, that wasn't translated, was very important. And what little he spoke himself, considering the brief time he had with them, would be limited to casual conversation. When he addressed the aliens in his final speech, he reverted to English. Which makes sense, with another alien able to act as translator, in a very heightened, emotional moment, Jake is probably not going to try to struggle with a broken native tongue to get across something urgent and eloquent...he's going to speak English. So the important stuff, I could understand.

I also liked that the downfall of the human invaders was not the native people, but the animal inhabitants. It made me think of The Birds. It's one thing to fight an alien species, but when the entire PLANET rises against you...what do all the guns and armor of the modern world mean? Nothing.

It also amused me how the little bugs looked like those dancing dolls with the wings that spin around so that they fly in the air.

New Year

I promise to update regularly. Or when something of note occurs.

.....New Year's resolution, perhaps?

I start off this year with a job, my own apartment, a cat who can't stand to be apart from me, a group of friends that enjoy my company, and a boyfriend who adores me. And can cook. God, it feels good to not be alone.

I will likely never love Korea, but am told that's okay.

I need to write my book.

And, I don't care if it's cheesy, here is my list of New Year's resolutions.

1) I will work out three times a week. Minimum.
2) I will...huh. Okay, I'll think about this a bit...

Second attempt at New Year's resolutions.

1) I will work out three times a week. Minimum
2) I will eat breakfast every day, snack nutritiously, and not eat after 8pm.
I will not eat Ramen more than five times a month. I will drink three large glasses of water a day.
3) I will write thank you notes immediately after receiving presents (that day, or the next).
4) I will...

Ok, this is getting ridiculous. I am never going to do all of this.

Right. So, what I SHALL do is remember what I have learned, i.e. budgeting. I know how much money I have to spend each day, and am keeping track of money spent. This first month, I shall concentrate on body. Next, month time organization. That one may take more than two months. But at the beginning of each month, I shall make a point of taking care of one more point of my well-being.

This month, personal health. I shall do the following THREE items to add to my list of Good Habits.

1) Work out three times a week. Minimum.
2) Drink three glasses of water a day. Minimum.
3) Eat breakfast, but not eat after 8pm.

My Good Habits are:
1) Daily budgeting.
2) Tracking expenses.
3) Taking care of dependents (i.e. my cat)
3) Calling home.

Hmmm. I can't think of others right now. I'm sure more will come to me.

Also, my New Year's RESOLUTION (singular) is to send out thank you cards no more than one day after receiving the present. Either that day, or if its too late, the next day.